0 notes

a givenness to divine abdication

"Perhaps we do not realize the problem, so to call it, of enabling finite free wills to co-exist with omnipotence.  

It seems to involve at every moment almost a sort of divine abdication.”

C.S. Lewis, The World’s Last Night and Other Essays


How else could there be Christ in me, the hope of glory?  

But could there ever be Christ in you, the hope of glory, because of Christ in me, the hope of glory, unless I also abdicate?

…I have a givenness to divine abdication.

0 notes

a givenness to when you walk in the room


When You walk in the room
When You walk in the room
When You walk in the room

There’s nothing like it, nothing like it.

Kari Jobe, When You Walk in the Room

When you enter, I try to leave, but can’t.  I just can’t.  I.  Just.  Can’t.  

I can’t.  And now I don’t want to.  Because we stay.  


…I have a givenness to when you walk in the room.

0 notes

a givenness to my season of defeat



is my season

of defeat.

Though all
is green

and death
is done,  

I feel alone.
As if the stone

rolled off
from the head

of the tomb
is lodged

in the doorframe
of my room,

and everyone
I’ve ever loved

lives happily
just past

my able reach.
And each time

Jesus rises
I’m reminded

of this marble

they are not
coming back.

Jill Alexander Essbaum, Easter

I believe in the resurrection of the dead.  But I’m not yet dead and they are. And I am here and they are there.

For now.  Only for now.  That is the hope of easter.

It is only for now.

…I have a givenness to my season of defeat.

0 notes

a givenness to the saidandmeant


"Only one person survived.  She survived because she was sitting in a basement in a basement reading through the story of her own life, checking for mistakes.

Previously, the room had been declared too shallow, but on that night, October 7, it was enough.

The rescuing hands pulled Liesel out and brushed the crumbs of rubble from her clothes.  What they didn’t notice was that the girl was still holding the book.  

She was still clutching the book.

She was holding desperately on to the words who had saved her life.”

Markus Zusak, The Book Thief

I woke up this morning with one word in my head.


'Sediment?'  No.  I thought it was 'sediment.'  But it wasn't.  It was 'saidandmeant.'  Yes.  That was it.  'Saidandmeant.'

That’s what was in the tomb.  It was saidiandmeant, wasn’t it. Saidandmeant was left in the bottom of the grave.

If the word became flesh, in Jesus Christ, then it was ‘saidandmeant.’  

What is said, and what is meant, becomes sediment within me. 

…I have a givenness to the saidandmeant.